This last weekend, two of my friends from high school, one of my favorite couples in real and fictional life, my high school OTP, got married. I am over the moon happy that Kate and Brett are finally husband and wife and not just husband and wife-ish. They have been a shining example of quirky love since our senior year of high school and I had a blast watching them delcare their love for one another and dancing to pop music from the 90’s and early 2000’s. That being said, I have weird and complicated feelings about the first wedding of one of my best friends from high school.
It is bizarre to see someone who I shared braces, high school dances and choir concerts with take such a adult step forward in life. This is that weird phase of being in your twenties where half of your friends are doing full blown adult things like passing the bar, adopting dogs, taking their health seriously and getting married. The other half, the half I belong to, are still trying to figure out how to pay all their bills, keep a respectable amount of clean laundry in the house and make meals for themselves w/out using the microwave.
Middle school and high school were these “life-uniforms” that pretty much looked the same on everyone. We all had relatively the same life experiences. Classes, carpool rides to Southdale, some sort of sport or extracurricular activity that told you who to hang out with, and hormones. Then all of a sudden adulthood comes around, people’s paths start diverging, and we all start dressing ourselves without a uniform to guide our decisions.
When someone you have been close with enters a new life stage as monumental as marriage, or motherhood, or some other marker of maturity, it is easy to feel like you are being left behind. Like they have figured out adulthood. They all of a sudden know how to dress themselves like an adult and you are still trying to figure out what the hell nylons are for (No seriously, if you actually know please leave it in the comments because I still don’t understand).
Just remember that adulthood is an outfit that looks different on everyone. It isn’t a matter of moving at different paces or growing up faster or slower than someone else. We’re all growing up at the same pace, just in different directions. Just because your friends in adulthood start dressing their lives a little differently than yours, doesn’t mean you can’t all go to the mall together.